TEST DRIVE MEME #7

[sailmods]

1. before she hung up, she said she was a skeleton

[there is no note in your cabin. no forces stall your legs if you decide to walk anywhere but the atrium. in fact, for the first time in hundreds of years, newly arrived passengers on the Serena Eterna are waking up with absolutely no guidance. nothing but your fellow passengers in the halls - or maybe in your bed.

perhaps you end up in the atrium eventually anyway. it is where guest services is, and where Gal Friday… actually hasn’t been in a few days. until today. and she is visibly frazzled, her hair uncoiffed, her suit rumpled, something a bit like a bruise blossoming down from her hairline and over her smooth features. more papers than ever cover her desk, and when she turns to face you, her voice is as cheerful as ever, but audibly strained.]

Welcome aboard the Serene Eterna! [a pause] You know how to work a life vest, right? Everyone knows that! You don’t need me to teach you that!

[a light bulb burns out behind her head.]

… I’ll get right on that!

[freedom includes the freedom to not know what the fuck is happening. maybe you should reflect on that.]

2. grandma went and can't stop screaming

[it’s something about the lighting fixtures, this month. has the Bellona always had a massive chandelier? maybe. who knows. don’t ask questions. either way, in the stillness of the night, or day, or late afternoon, there is a noise like a cord being cut, and the chandelier plunges into the audience below.

it hits nothing, of course. no one is ever in the theater. and that, perhaps, is what the trouble is.

so, the chandelier starts to… travel, one could say. it starts to hang in various rooms: the dining halls, the bars, the clubs… sometimes, if you’re out on the pool deck and suddenly realized you’re under a shadow, you can glance up and see it suspended 20 feet above your head, securely fastened to nothing in particular and yet remaining perfectly in place.

until it isn’t. until it falls, crystal shattering on whatever surface it lands on: floor, table, person… and, wherever the chandelier goes, a lilting childish voice follows it, singing without any obvious source.]

Ring-a-ring of roses, a pocket full of posies… ashes, ashes, we all…

3. jeff bezos murdered the infinite tommy bahama

[the lights of the Infinite Tommy Bahama go out three days into October.

barely an hour after its closure, the lights go on again, and a new banner is unfurled.



physically, it is the same store. you can even see the old signs hidden behind the new ones. however, long gone are the tropical prints and khaki dress shorts. now, one can purchase any number of officially licensed or legally distinct Halloween costumes, decorations, and various other haunted accoutrements, leading back as far as the eye can see, and then farther still. is that a Gal Friday mask? spooky! well, at least you’ll be good and ready for the Halloween party at the end of the month, which is absolutely just a normal party and in no way whatsoever anything even remotely resembling a trick. there are only treats at The Infinite Spirit Halloween!

note: bahamanuel is still here! somewhere! it kinda looks like dan bongino.]

Comments

[wedobonesmotherfucker]

Well that... Gideon blinks a few times as she takes that in.

"He actually have a chance of doing that?" Because that's the real question, isn't it? After all, God invited a dozen and a half of them to come to Canaan House to find out the secret to immortality and looks how that had turned out? There had actually been an answer to that one too. But what about this one?

[hellonspectacles]

“That is the pertinent question, isn’t it?” says Palamedes, pointing his spoon at Gideon for emphasis. The idea that someone could become a god isn’t foreign to their world, but that doesn’t mean anyone can do it anytime. “I suppose it depends what godhead means to him. He already possesses the ability to create pocket universes and elaborate illusions, craft wards and sigils the likes of which I have never seen, and bring people back from the dead in certain capacities. But that isn’t enough for him.”

Pal frowns faintly into his ice cream, once again brought up against the mystery he cannot crack: what does the captain really want, and do they dare give it to him? “Discovering what would satisfy him may be the key to escaping this place. Or it may mean our downfall.”

[wedobonesmotherfucker]

"Probably the downfall bit." Gideon mumbles. She can't say she's pleased to be back in another terrible game with high stakes, run by someone who sounds nearly as powerful as the Necrolord.

But she takes a breath and straightens her shoulders. Sighing like a tombsister isn't going to get either of them anyway. "Well, whatever you think is the best choice, I'm with you on it. Escape or end, it's better than sitting with our thumbs up our asses and waiting for the worst to happen, again. Just point me in a direction and tell me what to do, and until Hect's here to be your proper cavalier, I'll be your sword."

... oh and speaking of Hect- "I told Camilla that your last words to her were 'I love you'."

[hellonspectacles]

“As it happens, I’m inclined to agree with your analysis.” He offers a small smile. “Thank you for your support, and allow me to return it. I may not be the Reverend Daughter Harrowhark Nonagesimus, but I’ll try to keep the ghosts off your back.”

Pal freezes with his spoon of ice cream halfway to his mouth, his eyebrows climbing up his forehead. “Nice of you to give her a laugh. I’m sure she needed it.”

[wedobonesmotherfucker]

"Things were pretty grim but she didn't even give me a chuckle. Didn't believe it for a second either." As tempting as it is to lie and say Hect confessed back, she knows it won't work. Camilla rumbled her instantly, didn't even blink, so it'll be the same with Pal. "I told her the truth, and she just came out all knives and teeth. The Sixth knows how to train them."

Gideon looks at her empty cup and glances back at the rows of ice cream. "... I'm going to go blow my mind with another. What else is good?"

[hellonspectacles]

Pal’s expression softens as he swallows his spoonful of ice cream, his gaze going distant and a little sad. He thinks about Cam every day, of course, but speaking about her with Gideon makes her seem closer—and less reachable—than ever. “Ah, well. Cam has always been a unique talent,” he says, not about to reveal just how unique Camilla Hect’s skills are among Sixth House fighters. Even here, a long way from the Houses and the empire, that feels like something worth keeping close to the chest.

“The world is your oyster, Nav,” he says, gesturing back at the row of ice cream flavors. “But if you haven’t tried chocolate yet, I highly recommend it.”