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TEST DRIVE MEME #7
1. before she hung up, she said she was a skeleton
[there is no note in your cabin. no forces stall your legs if you decide to walk anywhere but the atrium. in fact, for the first time in hundreds of years, newly arrived passengers on the Serena Eterna are waking up with absolutely no guidance. nothing but your fellow passengers in the halls - or maybe in your bed.
perhaps you end up in the atrium eventually anyway. it is where guest services is, and where Gal Friday… actually hasn’t been in a few days. until today. and she is visibly frazzled, her hair uncoiffed, her suit rumpled, something a bit like a bruise blossoming down from her hairline and over her smooth features. more papers than ever cover her desk, and when she turns to face you, her voice is as cheerful as ever, but audibly strained.]
Welcome aboard the Serene Eterna! [a pause] You know how to work a life vest, right? Everyone knows that! You don’t need me to teach you that!
[a light bulb burns out behind her head.]
… I’ll get right on that!
[freedom includes the freedom to not know what the fuck is happening. maybe you should reflect on that.]
2. grandma went and can't stop screaming
[it’s something about the lighting fixtures, this month. has the Bellona always had a massive chandelier? maybe. who knows. don’t ask questions. either way, in the stillness of the night, or day, or late afternoon, there is a noise like a cord being cut, and the chandelier plunges into the audience below.
it hits nothing, of course. no one is ever in the theater. and that, perhaps, is what the trouble is.
so, the chandelier starts to… travel, one could say. it starts to hang in various rooms: the dining halls, the bars, the clubs… sometimes, if you’re out on the pool deck and suddenly realized you’re under a shadow, you can glance up and see it suspended 20 feet above your head, securely fastened to nothing in particular and yet remaining perfectly in place.
until it isn’t. until it falls, crystal shattering on whatever surface it lands on: floor, table, person… and, wherever the chandelier goes, a lilting childish voice follows it, singing without any obvious source.]
Ring-a-ring of roses, a pocket full of posies… ashes, ashes, we all…
3. jeff bezos murdered the infinite tommy bahama
[the lights of the Infinite Tommy Bahama go out three days into October.
barely an hour after its closure, the lights go on again, and a new banner is unfurled.
physically, it is the same store. you can even see the old signs hidden behind the new ones. however, long gone are the tropical prints and khaki dress shorts. now, one can purchase any number of officially licensed or legally distinct Halloween costumes, decorations, and various other haunted accoutrements, leading back as far as the eye can see, and then farther still. is that a Gal Friday mask? spooky! well, at least you’ll be good and ready for the Halloween party at the end of the month, which is absolutely just a normal party and in no way whatsoever anything even remotely resembling a trick. there are only treats at The Infinite Spirit Halloween!
note: bahamanuel is still here! somewhere! it kinda looks like dan bongino.]
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Guess you could say she's facing the music?Were it not for her heels, Jinx would absolutely be taller than her, but for now, they're practically eye to eye when she stands closer. It's enough of a discomfort to make her take a step back. She's not exactly used to people being this close to her in general? And Jinx seems a bit... unpredictable. Like those rowdy fans she gets sometimes.
Yet, once she seats herself, Seraphine is quick to right herself, with that same look of attentiveness on Jinx as she had for the ghost singing from the chandelier previously. ]
Oh, I disagree. Screaming helps immensely. Especially if you have stage jitters or just anxious in general, it's just... fun to let it all out with one big wail, I think. Obviously, there are times that call for it and times that don't, but I wouldn't say it never helps.
Haven't you just wanted to... like, let it all out?
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you must go to your corner for your pun.)Yep! That's where my explosions and shooting things come from. Best stress relief a girl can have. — But I'm outta bullets and as much as I would like to obliterate this boat, that would mean being seen by the people here. And I hate almost every single on of 'em.
So, my anger is now everyone's problem. Sucks to be you guys!!
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She ends up going over to a seat next to Jinx and sits next to her, some mixture of worry and a want to understand in her eyes. ]
You hate them? Can I ask why?
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(she waves a hand in the air.)
They can do what they want, say what they want, and stomp on the less fortunate as much as they want. If I wanted to live like home, I would had stayed there. ... Not that I had a choice.
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Well, as you said, they're here on this ship with us. As far as I can tell, we're probably all on equal footing, aren't we? Correct me if I'm wrong, of course. But... I think that if you really feel that way, you should let your voice be heard. I believe everyone should be given that chance.
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(at her suggestion though, jinx snorts with a shake of her head. there's a brief smile but it quickly drops.)
Cute, but that never works well for me. I get better responses from a wall. — And they're waaaaay chatter than you'd think.
(what.)
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Well, maybe it hasn't worked because you never had the medium to be heard. The thing about people is... they never really want to hear. Really hear. And part of it is because people think they know what the other person is thinking. As if people aren't something intricately complex, or as if we don't all have stories to be told.
But I think that that's why it's important to have a medium by which you let yourself be heard. There's a lot of ways to do that, you know... but... if you'd like... I could listen to you? Then, if you'll let me, I can put your thoughts and feelings into a song.
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(jinx sinks further in her seat and this time, adverts her gaze from seraphine. maybe if she arrived onboard way in the beginning of her journey, she would give that a try. but so much has happened, so many deaths, fights, misunderstandings, and heartache that now... now she is worn down of it all. when jenny told her the captain was going to shatter her, jinx had no clue how right she was.
it seems every second of her day, her mind cracks just a little more. and what can one do when they get pushed so far, they no longer feel the passion to move?)
I'm too tired. I don't... want to do much of anything, anymore. Now a days? I just want to disappear.
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But there’s also something shaky in the bass. Foreboding. Or… maybe melancholy…?
… ]
You know, I’ve found that if we don’t experience these lows from time to time, we’ll never truly appreciate the highs. And you will experience highs again. Life has a funny way of making sure of it.
…
Besides, there’s something here… that wants you to take care of yourself. I can hear it plain as day.
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(she grumbles but then turns her head over at the songstress. but her words remind her and are in sync of many in her life who would say something similar. vi, ekko, venti... lumine. jinx finds herself scoffing out a small hum and a huff through her nostrils. what is it about her attracting people with so much hope in their hearts? although... she supposes someone needs to have that around here.)
I don't really get highs. (a beat and then a smirk.) — 'Less you mean watchin' someone dance in my flames after I blow somethin' up. Now that is a high no one can match.
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Well, everyone’s got their muses! And their muses are going to make them happy. It seems you’ve already thought of one!!! Though, maaaaaybe we should find another one that’s a little less violent?? We don’t wanna go silencing someone else’s song to dance to the beat of our own. Songs are much better when you can find a way to play them together!
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(...)
Can I ask ya somethin', Lullaby?
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Of course. I'm not about to stop you.
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although, jinx still isn't sure if the singer had been aware of all of her hijinks. in a way, it'd be hard not to but... who knows? maybe her singing gig kept her out of the real world of things.)
... Let's say people don't like you. Maybe not everyone but a good amount. And with the way you are, you tend to cause a lotta... problems. People even see you as a problem and they want you to change. But what if you like who you are? And your dad, he...— he told you for years that you're perfect. So you want to be the same for him and for yourself. But... the more you be yourself, the more people dislike you. And you might end up alone in the long run.
So do you change everythin' about yourself for them but hate yourself every day? Or do you stay as yourself and lose everyone? Either way you lose but... which sucks more?
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Well, that's sort of something that will vary from person to person, I think. For instance, for me, I... well, my "muse" is everyone. Thus, if I had to pick between "being me, but alone" or "having friends, but changing" I would simply have to change, because it's other people that make me happy. But that might not be the case for everyone.
...
In fact, it shouldn't be the case for everyone. People shouldn't have to change if they don't want to. It's... [ Beat. ] ...My parents met in the smoggiest part of Zaun. And they loved each other so, so much despite their circumstances. But when my mom found out she was pregnant with me she was so scared because the child mortality rates in the area was... low. Real low.
So, they ended up working more and more until they barely even saw each other so they could scrape together enough money to buy their way into Piltover, just 'cause they wanted a good life for me.
And it's... frustrating that they had to sacrifice so much of their happiness for someone else. I don't fault them, and I love them very much for everything they've done for me. They say they're happier for it, because they really wanted to see me live a better life than they did. I just hate to think that that's the only way they could've done things. I hate to think that there's people who have to change so, so much just to feel like...
...
"I don't know," is my answer. I'm sorry.
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(there's a sigh of defeat. it's true, she doesn't fault seraphine to not know the answer to that question. but it's a question jinx wishes someone could reply to already, so she can move on with things. but maybe the whole point is for her to figure it out on her own. to choose a path on this fork road she's been on for who knows how long. all the same though, she is exhausted from trying to figure this out. her mind is completely at shambles and all she wants to do now is to isolate in peace, regroup, and hopefully recover?
the theater is her safe space, but it's only a matter of time until ekko or someone who will waltz in to get her to speak about her ~feelings~ when she is in no mood. or perhaps isolating is the wrong thing to do, too. again, she is so at a loss with everything now. everything use to make sense but lately? it's like up is down, down is up, sideways is a circle, and blue is the square root of nine.)
Y'know, I thought I — uh, I mean. You would think you've improved some, at least. You haven't waved your gun around every second someone pisses you off. Or go on a killin' spree so... that should count for somethin', right? I dunno. Maybe to some it's not enough.
(and jinx does something that's probably unexpected to the songstress and that's to rest her head on her shoulder. it's most likely high inappropriate, but her circle is getting smaller and smaller these days. and the tinier they are, the less shoulders for her to lean on.)
You... really to try to be nice and friendly. But it's hard to put a smile on when someone says stuff that'll upset ya. ... Doesn't help when — (...) — when somethin' happened to you and now you got this side-effect where you're... angry. A lot. And you can't control it a lotta times.
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[ Wasn't she frowning just seconds ago? Where's this pep coming from so suddenly? ]
If this were me, I'd keep taking the steps forward as I'd need to. Remember that you need to do what's best for you, though. If you end up doing something that might, in the end, hurt you, maybe you should consider other options? And, you know, if there's really a lot of emotional build-up and such, maaaybe talking to a doctor might do you some good, too. Mine's been pretty nice to me when I had some stuff going on, too!!
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(UGH. that's something she hoped to never hear again and yet here she is. jinx is rolling her eyes so far behind her head that there might be a chance it'll get stuck back there.)
More like "City of Snob-gress". (nailed it. ha! fucking GOT 'EM) — And I got news for ya, Lullaby, there's not a lotta doctors around here. And I'm pretty sure I'm a lost case.
(there's a slight shift as she makes herself just a little more comfortable -- arms more folded and practically using the seraphine's shoulder as a pillow.)
You got any songs about healin' the mind?
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Okay, that one snuck up on Seraphine. She can't help but laugh, but what's wrong with that? If she can't laugh at the things she loves, then there's really no point! Besides, Jinx is right, they can get a little snobbish up in Piltover. ]
Well, then we'll just have to keep hoping and maybe find something creative for you to put your energy into! That's usually pretty therapeutic for me, anyway! [ It's one of the many reasons she loves singing so much.
Speaking of, at the mention of singing, she hops up from her seat to go out into the walkway of the theater. She could probably hop up on the actual stage for a song, but it seems she just has one of her own that she carries around with her. Currently, it's hanging from her back like a bag, but she quickly sets it down so that it starts to hover just a couple inches from the ground, and she steps onto it with a clearing of her throat. She vocalizes a few starting notes, attempting to think of a song on the spot...
And then starts to sing. ]
Self-hatred, I'm fighting,
Feels like a prison cell,
But this story I'm writing,
Helps me remind myself,
The rock bottom only got me higher,
Won't be a victim, I'm a survivor,
I refuse to believe the liar in my head,
The proof is stitched in my scars.
I'm strong enough, I'm strong enough.
I found myself through the dark,
Not giving up, not giving up.
I've come to understand,
That tragedy's a second chance,
My dying breath is where I was born,
Now I'm stronger than my storm,
Stronger, stronger
Stronger than my storm.
[ Besides the fact that it's a bit of a genre clash for such a sparkly pop idol to be singing a rock song, Jinx will notice that she almost feels... invigorated? Energetic, somehow, and if she has any minor scrapes or cuts or bruises on her, those will seem to heal over gradually over the duration of her singing. She might not be able to heal the mind, but she can at least make Jinx feel a little better... just in the moment. ]
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it'll hurt sure but it's like what venti said. friendship is a two-way street, so maybe she can continue to be more polite little by little. unfortunately and recently, she relapsed but she is stronger than whirlwinds. she can pull herself back up and pick up where she left off. jinx can start with apologizes (even if some she feels they owe her one too for their words) and if they don't forgive her, that's... fine. but doing it in the first place is a big deal. especially from her of all people. after that? she'll just... go from there?
but anyway, the song is lovely and when she opens her eyes to watch her, jinx smirks at seraphine enjoying herself. it's a pleasant to see after seeing so much gloom lately.)
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She picks herself up and gives an optimistic smile. ]
I hope that helps! I can't seem to make that mischievous voice happy, but I'll feel a little better knowing I could do so for someone else.
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(she had to say it. that comment was just boiling in her bones. but now with that out of the way, jinx relaxes back into her seat with her head tilting back and forth -- attempt to pull out any sores.)
So what's the plan for you now that you're here?
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[ Seraphine even plays with her bangs a bit, brushing her hair back and posturing herself up on the stage. It continues to float and pulse with an energy that... isn't quite hextech, even if there does seem to be bits and pieces here that use it. ]
I'm gonna be honest, I've never really been good at making plans. Not outside of engineering, anyway. I'm more of a... go with the flow sort of gal! Though, um, I would like to meet everyone? Maybe if I can get some sort of bearing on meeting the people here and learning about what's happening, I can help out somehow.
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(the magic word of the day, it seems. this sparks up her own energy as she hops up from the seat and heads on her way to her.)
Y'know, I am, too! But you probably already know that. All the weapons I carry are weapons I made solely on my own. I'd show 'em to you if they were here. Got 'em stored away for now for safe keeping.
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I have a tech guitar in my room as well. It's gotta couple bugs that I'm working out, but it's functional. I'm hoping that maybe I can add some more settings and stuff to it, if I can. Though I'm noooot so sure I'll be able to do that here.
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