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TEST DRIVE MEME #1
1. now it's fun to wake up in a strange chateau
[you wake up.
it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.
the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:
Dear Passenger(s),
As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.
At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!
See You Real Soon!
Sincerely,
Gal Friday
you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.
you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]
Welcome aboard! We're so glad to have you!
[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.]
2. messing with my mind was fun at the time
[freshly lei'd, your legs are forced to lead out onto the deck and towards your muster station. the same woman is there, carrying a clipboard. this time, she introduces herself as Gal Friday, the cruise director, before immediately going into the muster drill spiel. it is very boring, and you are not allowed to move, except when you are required to show you know how to put your life vest on. you could try to not do this, but Friday will move to stand in front of you very closely and just. look in your direction until such a time that you decide to do it. and I'm sure your fellow passengers want you to just get on with it, too.
but, once it ends? she reiterates her desire to welcome you aboard. and, then, you're free.
well, free to move about the ship at your own leisure, of course. which is a kind of free, and probably the best one you can hope for. you could try to escape, maybe, if you have the means to; Friday certainly won't be one to stop you. that's what the barrier is for, after all.
but, wouldn't you much rather have fun?
the buffet is full. the pool is open. the casino jingles and chimes.
welcome aboard.]
3. lots of mystery in the history of the devils I knew
[you were never alone.
a few days have passed since you first arrived on the Serena Eterna. perhaps you've made yourself a little routine, and settled in a bit. or maybe you haven't done that at all. either way, you're here, and it looks like somebody is pretty pissed off about it.
it starts small. sometimes nearby plates skid off tables, or a pool chair upends while you're walking next to it. and sometimes that chair is aimed right at your head. objects are moving with quickly increasing frequency, and a wide variety of styles: some are dropped, or pushed, and others and others are tossed, but a few of the items are thrown, with great force and odd accuracy. if Friday is around during the lighter moments, she simply titters and cleans up whatever mess is made. if a pot of soup sails off the buffet line and nearly drenches you in boiling minestrone, she simply walks away.
and then there's the voices. hundreds, maybe thousands, calling out. not all are intelligible English, but you seem to understand them anyway. some sound scared, or angry. some are screams, others whispers. some sound entirely strange, while others are achingly familiar. and they're all saying the same exact thing:
Get Out.]
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Rita-- I didn't know you cared!
[ He's fully laughing now, and has somehow managed not to drop his own ice cream ]
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You...You idiot! Go and drop dead!
[And she throws a punch at his chest for being a jerk!]
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Aw, come on, Rita. You don't mean it.
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Sh-shut up!
[Face still beet-red, she snatches his ice cream and takes a big bite as her form of revenge (nevermind there's still an entire fridge full of huge tubs).
--And then she immediately gets brain freeze.]
Mm--!
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He looks away with another soft laugh. ]
Don't eat it so fast, jeez.
[ He gets himself another one, tossing more gald on the counter. He does not, however, go to clean up the ice cream on the floor. ]
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[Somehow! She is going to be grumpy about this at least until she finishes this ice cream, and then maybe (almost certainly) she'll silently forgive him, because she isn't going to hold a grudge over a stupid joke like this (even if it does upset her after the all-too-recent pain they've gone through between Raven and Estelle.
The chill finally leaves her brain, and glances briefly at him getting another helping, before more slowly going back to his--now hers--cone.]
...Idiot.
[She'll get that in one more time.]
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[ He eats his own ice cream now, silently. It feels like a real treat. Dead, and eating ice cream. Look at him now.
Casually, like it's a normal topic of conversation: ]
So, you got theories about this ship? How we got here? Because I got nothing.
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She lowers her cone and looks around them once more.]
I don't have enough information yet to know how it happened, but... This is no ordinary ship, that's for sure. I don't know the exact size, but it's obviously way bigger than any normal ship. It might even rival the Heracles. And it looks like the construction's all metal, too...
Whoever's behind this has a lot of money to throw around.
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[ He looks around the shop, the barren deck of the ship. It is weird, isn't it? Them two, not even Estelle or Ioder or Flynn. They would be worth something. Maybe Rita's worth something, but Yuri sure isn't.
But, again, he could be dead. Or this could be some kind of prison. Or if could all be random, he has no idea. ]
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[That reminds her, though--her last memories might be of Zaphias, but according to Yuri, they'd already left.]
By the way... What's the last thing you remember before this? You said Alexei...died--
[And it's still weird, yeah!]
--but how long ago was that?
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A couple minutes. He was crushed, then, bam, I woke up here.
[ A little lie of omission can't hurt her, right? ]
Glad that guy's gone. He was bad news.
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[She huffs in irritation, takes another lick of ice cream, and shakes her head.]
It couldn't have been because he damaged the blastia, or else it wouldn't just be the two of us--and all those other people weren't even there.
Ugh, this is seriously annoying.
[If a chunk of her memories really are missing, who's to say that the same isn't true for Yuri? Not that something they can't remember is of any help...]
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I dunno if it's important, either. Getting you back home is more important. [ It's a little bit of a slip-- getting Rita back home, not both of them, because he can't. Right? He can't.
Back home from... wherever this is. ]
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[Anyway, that--sure is a weird way to word things, and Rita frowns at him again.]
Unless you have some reason you wanna stay, shouldn't we both be getting home?
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[ Especially after the last few months. He plasters a smile on is face, waving a hand ]
Come on, Rita. You don't like it, just a little?
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[Rita would absolutely deny that she even likes this ice cream right now, simply because it came from the ship. Even if she's still eating it.]
Even if I did want a vacation, it wouldn't be in a place like this.
[Not that being on the Fiertia was all that bad (aside from all the salty sea spray), and Estelle sure liked seeing everything...]
Besides, I thought the guild was your thing now.
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[ And ice cream, which he's also enjoying. Death never tasted so sweet. ]
Well, no use thinking about it. We'll just have to find a way offa this ship.
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And how do you expect to figure that out without thinking?
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[ He looks away from here to eat his ice cream, suppressing a smile ]
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[It's almost like he intentionally got her determination fired up instead of leaving her to complain that it's easier said than done.
She bites off a chunk of the waffle cone and smirks at him.]
I'll call for you if I need some breaking-and-entering.
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[ But he should... really learn how to. It's really a skill one would think Yuri has, but, nope. No breaking, only entering if a window is ajar. Then it's basically an invitation.
But, legitimately, he believes that if anyone can figure it out, it's Rita. ]
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[In the meantime, she has been thinking, though.]
We need to figure out where we are, and where this thing is going. There must be some maps or charts around somewhere.
[Not...that Rita has any clue how to read naval charts. Karol is surprisingly useful to have around sometimes, when he's keeping the map the right way up.]
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But even so, Yuri is impressed. Honestly, he hadn't even thought that far yet ]
Yeah, good idea. And there can't just be that lady, Friday, right? One person can't man a whole ship. Maybe there's someone else we can ask what the hell is going on?
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That, and make this thing take us back.
[She makes a fist with the hand not holding the ice cream, because one way or another, they'll make it happen.]