TEST DRIVE MEME #1

[sailmods]

1. now it's fun to wake up in a strange chateau

[you wake up.

it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.

the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:

Dear Passenger(s),

As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.

At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!

See You Real Soon!

Sincerely,
Gal Friday

you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.

you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]

Welcome aboard! We're so glad to have you!

[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.]

2. messing with my mind was fun at the time

[freshly lei'd, your legs are forced to lead out onto the deck and towards your muster station. the same woman is there, carrying a clipboard. this time, she introduces herself as Gal Friday, the cruise director, before immediately going into the muster drill spiel. it is very boring, and you are not allowed to move, except when you are required to show you know how to put your life vest on. you could try to not do this, but Friday will move to stand in front of you very closely and just. look in your direction until such a time that you decide to do it. and I'm sure your fellow passengers want you to just get on with it, too.

but, once it ends? she reiterates her desire to welcome you aboard. and, then, you're free.

well, free to move about the ship at your own leisure, of course. which is a kind of free, and probably the best one you can hope for. you could try to escape, maybe, if you have the means to; Friday certainly won't be one to stop you. that's what the barrier is for, after all.

but, wouldn't you much rather have fun?

the buffet is full. the pool is open. the casino jingles and chimes.

welcome aboard.]

3. lots of mystery in the history of the devils I knew

[you were never alone.

a few days have passed since you first arrived on the Serena Eterna. perhaps you've made yourself a little routine, and settled in a bit. or maybe you haven't done that at all. either way, you're here, and it looks like somebody is pretty pissed off about it.

it starts small. sometimes nearby plates skid off tables, or a pool chair upends while you're walking next to it. and sometimes that chair is aimed right at your head. objects are moving with quickly increasing frequency, and a wide variety of styles: some are dropped, or pushed, and others and others are tossed, but a few of the items are thrown, with great force and odd accuracy. if Friday is around during the lighter moments, she simply titters and cleans up whatever mess is made. if a pot of soup sails off the buffet line and nearly drenches you in boiling minestrone, she simply walks away.

and then there's the voices. hundreds, maybe thousands, calling out. not all are intelligible English, but you seem to understand them anyway. some sound scared, or angry. some are screams, others whispers. some sound entirely strange, while others are achingly familiar. and they're all saying the same exact thing:

Get Out.]

Comments

[marmoron]

Yeah? Well I can't help noticing you're not exactly having any problems with your bathroom.

[ he assumes anyway. ]

Or are you?

[sunappealing]

Do not presume that we are equals, boy. I am of the Sun, of Azim’s favored children, and I stand as most radiant. You are of the earth, I know not what the spirits of the washroom would consider offensive… [There’s a pause as he looks the young man up and down in distaste.] but I have few doubts you managed to do so.

[Massive ego and delusions of grandeur aside, The Sun’s Favored Child was getting a sore shoulder, so finally he bothered to properly sheath the axe. The boy was clearly no threat to him after all.]

I presume the spirits merely honor my birthright, tis not as though I commit my axe to battle without cause.

[Granted, sometimes that “cause” was someone calling him names and making him mad. In reality, he’s likely attributed such suspicious happenings as attacks from his captors.]

[marmoron]

....

[ there are so many things wrong here that it actually gets keith to shut up just to stare for a second. but be ye not fooled into thinking he's been stunned into deference. ]

...Right. Radiant. I'm sure that's what everyone says about you. Which star quadrant are you from? Never heard of a sun called Azim before.

[ making a mental note to never visit, thanks. ]

[skaikru]

( any survivors is a good number, honestly. let her have this moment. )

Is there any possibility to like here?

( There Is Not^TM, thanks for coming to clarke griffin's ted talk )

[skaikru]

( one beat in turn.

then two. look, she's a better bulldozer than negotiator, and thus far gal friday hasn't been threatening enough to make clarke stop pushing. )

And how do I get there?

[skaikru]

( they're definitely not talking about the same thing, but simultaneously it's probably not that far off. yes, it was an explosion — it was just... the whole world exploding? and yes, it all went back to cores, but in her time it had been the cores of nuclear reactors stationed all across the world simultaneously melting down and putting an end to the last stragglers of the human species.

clarke doesn't know what a blastia core is, and blinks like a particularly stupid deer caught in headlights for a few moments. )

It was... everywhere? ( it's like speaking two different dialects with the same parent language. ) I'm saying the world ended in a wave of fire, and I just wasn't dead yet when —

( a pointed glance all around them. when being the entirety of the ship, this whole sordid affair, their kidnapping, and the rampant seasickness. )

— I woke up.

( she's only seen a scant few people aboard so far, but it's been enough to realize they've not all been dragged from the same reality or era. clarke isn't stuck on the idea they've all lived very different lives, in very different worlds, under very different circumstances. she's won't be surprised if her mention of the apocalypse doesn't elicit a visceral reaction from people who haven't lived through it. but please rita, mention magic and watch her head spin off her neck. )

What were you doing before you were here?

[neverleave]

[Okay, so they're not leaving. Natsuno frowns, but does take a moment to consider the option of magnetism. Maybe it can work on a fork, but...]

Doesn't explain the other stuff that's been flying around. Like chairs and plates.

This is my first time breaking out this character but now I’m not sure anything will top this

[sunappealing]

‘Tis indeed how I am addressed in my homeland.

[By his tribe, which is likely the equivalent of a mother telling their child that they are the smartest. They are all just a deluded as he is.]

I hail from the Azim Steppes, where my people have lived since creation.

[That… that counts as a star quadrant right? That’s about as close as he’ll get to a useful answer. His people have a rather poor reputation with outsiders due to their pugnacious nature and gravitation towards violence.]

I know not what Hyurs such as you refer to our sun as, such is beneath my concern. Call it whatever you wish.

[skaikru]

( that'll come in time, john says. and clarke internally counters with: yes, and on my timeline.

boil the soup stock down to the bones, there's no real reason for her to fight that hard against their current predicament. all her friends back home are either burnt, buried, and blindly sailing through space on a fools mission. clarke herself had been dying on a cold tile floor, miserably alone. there's no life to go back to, but she'll be digging her heels in to find a link back to her home world regardless. fighting comes second nature now; a change of scenery doesn't immediately shake well learned survival techniques.

so she wants to fight, and he wants to laugh. they're easily at odds with priorities, but that doesn't mean it's not useful to maintain a reasonable acquaintanceship. who knows, maybe they'd each prove useful to the other in time. )

Alright. ( clarke's chewing on her lower lip, the skin already so dry, cracked, tasting of blood, and smarting. ) I hope you're right and this is all something we can laugh about in the future, but. I can't sit still and just accept there's nothing to be done or learned about it.

cabin

[neverleave]

[Natsuno has been exploring the ship deck-by-deck, trying - and failing - to find any useful clues. The moment he approaches the open door, he's struck with the feeling of being unwelcom, like an invisible barrier. Stupid vampire weakness. Common areas are fine, but apparently individual cabins are off limits.

Okay then. He stands by the doorframe instead.]

Okay. What is it?

[Who knows, maybe it'll help him figure something out.]

[neverleave]

Yuuki.

[Empty lockers on this side, as well. Natsuno is torn between feeling relieved (no potential army of the dead) and annoyed (no clues).]

Find anything anywhere? I think the crew cabins are right next to us, but the way's blocked.

[...and he's not sure if it's inaccessible because he's a vampire, or because it's just. inaccessible.]

[axemeaquestion]

[Blink.] So who's "she"?

[conjobs]

Not unless you're that way inclined. [John is referring to a wild night in bed strapped to the headboard being fucked senseless of course but at least he's not being very explicit about it. Even though 'that way inclined' might be a little vague.]

Been on a cruise before? [He's going to guess no, in which case he's more than happy to show her around even though he's not a staff member or a frequent cruiser. He'd even do it without pants, but hopefully as they wander around there will be pants for the taking, or at least something to make him half-decent.]

[conjobs]

Pretty sure you're awake. [Insofar as he's pretty sure he's real and not a figment of Will's imagination. Could be that they're all asleep somewhere, dreaming about being together, but usually John would have had to ingest a fair amount of mind-altering substances and cast a dodgy spell for that. And Will, well. He doesn't look like the spell type. He investigates real crimes with body totems and all.]

Well you know the good thing about whiskey - either you'll hear more and can't tell much of a difference, or you'll stop giving a toss. [Either way, he comes out on top. Which just means they'll be needing a bottle sooner rather than later.]

[conjobs]

Well if he wants a study on actual human people he's hanging out with the wrong fellow. Not that John isn't actually human, but he's probably not very 'normal' in various senses of the word.

Putting the stress ball in Craig's hand, John slips his hands back into his pockets and flashes Craig a lopsided smirk.

"When you're feeling a wee bit stressed, give it a few squeezes. It'll make you feel better." There's probably a perfectly rational explanation for it; brain releasing some chemicals or whatever. John's more of a magic person than a science person so he wouldn't be able to explain it too well. Best thing is for Craig to give it a shot himself.

Craig could always talk to it if he has no friends, or glare it into submission, but it'd be sad to come away from a cruise holiday without at least making one friend.

[conjobs]

[Oh boy, he's always wanted... free sand. That's going to be difficult to nick without exposing himself if sand doesn't start trickling from between his fingers. He tries to take just a little bit out of her pocket in case there's anything special about the sand, hopefully not enough that she would notice, before he pulls back with a smile, eyebrows raised.]

Everything okay? [She froze up for a bit there. It was a little weird.]

[conjobs]

It's a cruise ship. There must be hookers on board. [Either they haven't really looked everywhere yet, or it's still early days and everyone can still afford everything they could possibly want from the gift shop. The desperation might start to sink in a little later.]

'ow does that work? [Is the ship some kind of purgatory?] You've been talking to her? What else did she say?

[conjobs]

"Really? You've been abducted by some who knows what and put on a ship with a holeless-faced not-woman-woman trying to corral us and bloody poltergeists having a go left right and centre, and you're worried about your fucking 9 to 5? Piss off!" If he cared enough to want to know what the fuck is wrong with her, he's not asking out loud.

[conjobs]

No, you're right. [There's always something to be learnt and Lord knows he's not always a quick study. Sometimes he has to learn things the hard way through the same lesson being delivered multiple times through multiple different avenues. He'd like to think he's been getting better, but. He's stubborn and sometimes tries to overcomplicate things that should be rather simple.]

Well let's not sit still then. Where would you like to go? [He's sufficiently decent even if he's not necessarily properly dressed, and he doesn't have any plans considering he knows about as much as she does (probably even less) about where 'here' is, why he's 'here' and what he's supposed to do, so. He'll follow her around if she doesn't mind the company.]

[stubboarn]

Ah - you can come in. I imagine it'd be more comfortable than standing there ...

[ he makes room in his small cabin for him to sit somewhere. the thing that's confounding him: the smartphone. ]

Will you let me send a few messages to you to try it out?

We don't have this technology where I come from, and I'd like to test it for myself.

[learntoread]

Yes, I've heard of the sea, but never seen it in person until now.

[ Tabia offers an uncertain smile. ]

Even if we have no answers for our questions, it would surely be easier to find them if we had friends to count on. I hope I'll be able to count you among them.

[sweetsong]

Oh... that's definitely different.

[ and he feels a little bad for making it sound like rainbows and sunshine when his situation is clearly very different than hers? still though, it's hard for him to not feel optimistic despite it all.

why?

because he hasn't been smacked around by weird possessed things yet. ]

I'm sorry.

[ wait. ]

A city... replaced by a boat. That sounds like magic.

[kidnapcard]

You can't figure it out if you think about it so much you burn yourself out either.

[Then again Roxanne shouldn't be lecturing someone for impulsively chasing after something given her own track record. Details!

Her brows rise a little at the question and then she laughs, the tone of it airy and more than a little sheepish.]

Let's just say I've been through a lot.

[neverleave]

[The invisible barrier around the door disappears. Natsuno hates it - it feels like deception and he decides to take as little advantage of invites as possible.

He leans against the wall instead of sitting and pulls out his smartphone.]

Sure. Where I'm from, we have something similar, but less advanced I think.

[Being 1997 and all. He wonders just where and WHEN this guy is from - looks like they collect all sorts here...]

[stubboarn]

I assure you, that's more experience than I'll ever have.

[ because he's a prince from the 1100s. they don't even have a printing press for the common people, it's controlled by the church.

he doesn't mind that the other one just stands; he wishes, however, he can actually be a proper host, but that's just not possible here. he'll have to make do with awkward introductions.

dimitri works his smartphone and then turns to him. ​]

What's your name?