TEST DRIVE MEME #10

[sailmods]

a. that's where we both belong

[you wake up.

it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.

the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:

Dear Passenger(s),

As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.

At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!

See You Real Soon!

Sincerely,
Gal Friday

you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.

you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]

Welcome aboard! I'm so happy you could join us!

[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.

after the drill is completed, you are seemingly free to go. or, well, your legs work, now. and maybe that's as good as it's gonna get.]

b. and there's plenty of that down by the sea

[it’s strange to think about, isn’t it? how all those new passengers, the ones grumbling or shouting their way through the forced muster drill, have absolutely no idea what happened just last month. no idea about the labyrinth. no concept of why anyone around them would be a bit more hesitant around shadows.

they’ll learn.

sometimes a shadow is darker than it’s supposed to be. very rarely does anything come of that; just a vague sense that someone is watching you, and little more. sometimes, though, the shadows move. sometimes they grab at your ankles as you walk. sometimes they give you a shove as you go down the stairs. sometimes they pull your hair, or pinch your arm.

sometimes you feel something sharp cut into your lower leg.

that’s not a shadow, though. that’s a fiddler crab. you see the crab, sometimes. the cut isn’t from its claws, which don’t look very intimating; it’s not a very large crab. the cut is from the large kitchen knife crudely taped onto its back. it’s probably fine. it's not chasing you. there isn't evil in its heart. probably.]

c. think I'll go back to the Keys

[one day, in the atrium, two pedestals suddenly appear. on each is a large button: one green, and one blue. pressing the blue button gives you a little treat, popping out of thin air next to you. pressing the green button sends a small electric shock through your body. weird, but, hey, pretty avoidable, right?

except, it seems to be spreading. to every other button on board.

in the elevator. on the soda machine. the arcade. your phone. the bell on Friday’s desk.]

Comments

[lordoftheozarks]

"It's really a shame that I cannot taste food. The smell is divine." That is said with genuine regret. He's always hated that he cannot properly enjoy Max's work. It's a cruel twist of fate that his pet would be someone so devoted to making and perfecting food when Erik possesses no taste buds. It also means Wayne has no reason to feel guilty for keeping the treat.

"Who doesn't love a kind-hearted baker, eh?" Well, it sounds like Max has been busy, as usual. This is what always happens if he doesn't keep that man on a short leash. No wonder Erik has been met with such an aggressive """welcoming party."""

"I take it there must be a kitchen here that is free for public use? Unless he's managed to sweet talk his way back into the staff areas."

[ablativeholopleather]

Perhaps Erik should take a moment to examine why that might be. A gentle act of rebellion perhaps, depriving his undeserving master?

"It's basically a universal trope right?" Amusing that people can still fall into those categories even out in the world.

At the question of the kitchen he just nods, and thumbs toward the elevator. "Off Windjammer, yeah. He's not always down there, sometimes it's Darcy and they're like...angry by default? A bunch of people roll through there pretty regularly. Not the safest place to hang around for a long time if you're waiting for one person. They get touchy if you hang out too long." Given he's been shooed away by folks besides Max for trying to use the microwave, under the assumption that he would be as destructive as Vance.

[lordoftheozarks]

"Tropes have some basis in reality, after all."

Off Windjammer? That must be a location. Why are there no maps around here? A real cruise ship would have some.

"I suppose that is another trope, a chef who wants no one else in their kitchen. You have a point. It would be much easier if you could give me Max's cabin number so I could text him myself."

[ablativeholopleather]

He agrees at the idea of tropes being a thing for a reason, but the thought is cut off at the request. A hand lifts in a denial sort of gesture, idly cutting through the air as it to say 'no can do'.

"Nah man, nah, that's not my info to just give out. You can totally get it from him yourself though, if he wants to give it to you himself."

[lordoftheozarks]

It was worth a try. Personally, he doesn't think his delivery could have been much smoother. Max, you certainly have picked your friends well.

"You're right, of course," Erik answers breezily. "But enough about him. Tell me more about yourself? I'm sure by now it won't come as a shock for me to say you are the most distinct individual I have ever laid eyes upon."

[ablativeholopleather]

At least Erik is patient and pleasant and willing to take it as it is. He's building himself into something that he's really, really not in Wayne's mind. It's going to be extremely unfortunate when the reality comes crashing in.

"Yeah, I get that a lot around here. As far as I know there's nobody else from my world, and nobody from somewhere equivalent except for these two grey kids." He's happy to walk along wherever it seems like Erik wants to go, having a meandering conversation. He'd answer any question presented to him within reason, and talk about the state of his world when he left it. This is an alien that has been through a lot of shit, so thanks for at least pretending to be nice.

[lordoftheozarks]

"Grey kids?" Erik asks with a note of alarm. "Are there children caught up in this as well?" Call him overly sensitive but even he has a soft spot for young children. Kidnapping them to a place as violent as this is unforgivable.

"So, when you say a different world, you truly mean an entirely different planet. How extraordinary. I have lived over a thousand years and seen much--this is a first for me. I am delighted to make your acquaintance."

[ablativeholopleather]

"They're not the only ones, but yeah." It had been a shock to learn that the multiple smaller humanoids that he's met around are not in fact just proportionally smaller like the familiar citizens of New Muldul, but actually more along the lines of the larvae that needed help and supervision.

"I do, yeah. There's a lot that doesn't translate so it's been a huge adjustment. Children as a concept was a weird one."

[lordoftheozarks]

"Children as a concept? You don't say? Do your species not procreate sexually?" Technically, neither does his. Not after they turn.

[ablativeholopleather]

"Nope. It's more of a 'conservation of matter' sort of deal. We die, our flesh returns to the planet. It gathers in certain spots, and larvae come out." A cycle that a few people have had some differing opinions on, considering that it doesn't mean that Waynes have progeny, as such. "You guys apparently don't have anything that works like that so it's hard to draw an equivalency."

[lordoftheozarks]

"Fascinating. No, humans and, well, vampires do not have any equivalent. But I believe I can still understand the concept just fine. Do your Larvae have to fend for themselves once they are sprouted? You are a sophisticated enough fellow that I imagine you do have some type of society. Is it communal?"

[ablativeholopleather]

"There are custodians for them, usually. Sometimes they wander off but for the most part they hang around one of the islands until they start coming upright. I think the closest thing to that would be puberty?" He's still finding where the Wayne cycle is equivalent to human development, but that sounds about right. "We take care of each other though, yeah. And, we've got Old Wayne looking out for us overall and making sure we're all on the same training schedule. Gotta know how to talk, read, fight, fly, stuff like that. Do vampires work like humans? I've never actually met one before that I know of."

[lordoftheozarks]

"That does not sound like an unpleasant way to grow up at all. Do you view each other as part of one great family, then? Brothers and sisters?" Or, is it just brothers?

"Yes and no. Vampires used to be humans. I was at the age I appear to you now when I was killed and turned into a vampire. I am, technically, undead. As such, I also do not procreate sexually. Though, I do still enjoy a good romp. My days of having heirs the natural human way are over, I'm afraid."

[ablativeholopleather]

"Brothers, sisters, cousins, niblings. We're all Waynes, we just choose our own names later. After the first Accretion, we apparently got a lot more insular. It's the only way I've ever known us to be though." He's not all that old, he's just been through a lot.

"So you're brought back but not brought back completely. Did you want heirs? ...does turning other people count as heirs? Or is that only for offspring?" Lines of succession aren't dictated by that kind of thing for him after all. Nepotism isn't really a concept for his people.

[lordoftheozarks]

"Correct. What some might call my soul was preserved inside my animated corpse, and it is now fed exclusively by blood. Some feel this condition to be a curse." He did, once, too. "Others learn to appreciate the opportunity it provides."

When asked about heirs and that process, Erik see-saws his hand noncommittally. "Vampires can name an heir even if they did not sire it, but that is rarer. I will try to explain this simply. When a vampire turns another it is called siring. And that newly turned vampire becomes his responsibility for a set amount of time. The Sire must mentor his Childe in how to be a vampire. Must teach them our rules and customs. It is very much like being a parent. This is why choosing to turn someone must not be done lightly. For as long as they are under your tutelage, you become responsible for their actions.

"But, there comes a time when that vampire no longer needs a mentor. They may then go out into the world and find someplace for themself. They could join their sire's clan or another. They will always be obligated to heed their sire's call to come if they are needed, but that is saved for rare emergencies. They are otherwise free to do what they wish with themselves.

"As for me, personally? I have named my right hand, and the only vampire I have ever personally sired, Josiah, as my heir. He is the one I trust most. I have no desire to sire any other vampires for myself. Josiah was a unique case. I chose, instead, to adopt other orphaned vampires abandoned by their true sires. I brought them up as my own and that was quite good enough for me."

[ablativeholopleather]

Wayne absorbs every word, making a mental note to add the information to his notebook the same way he'd added the tidbits about Changelings on a page all their own after the main brunt of his human-based education. Such a ready source willing to answer the questions he has without getting frustrated at relaying such basic information is such a boon.

"Even when someone is a full adult they still need the guidance of an elder so that they're more capable. That's sort of how Old Wayne is with the rest of us but he didn't necessarily make us like you guys make each other. He did collect those of us that weren't initially produced on the island like that though, kind of making us a family that way before we split off to go do our own things, like I did.

"When you say call, is it just like, a physical call? Or like a compulsion?"

[lordoftheozarks]

"I quite like how you describe it. Yes, you're right, just because you are grown does not necessarily mean you no longer need a mentor. Even I, at my advanced age, am still sometimes in need of guidance from vampires older than myself." He has, often enough, called on the advice of Eshe; she occupies the territory directly to the right of his. Hers perspective is a sound one.

"I'm glad that you do have some concept of what it is to be a family. To answer your question, no, it is not a compulsion. It is an obligation. If Old Wayne called you and said that you were needed at home, I assume you would feel that same obligation to return to help?"

[ablativeholopleather]

"Oh yeah man, a few cycles back that was exactly what happened actually. He put out a general call to bring us all back together and everyone came that was able to."

[lordoftheozarks]

"Yes. That's it exactly. It seems we are not so dissimilar after all."

He huffs a small (performative) sigh, then adds, "I've yet to have to call on my adoptees in such a way and I hope never to need to. Unfortunately, my own Sire has long since passed on so I am in no danger of having to heed his call."

[ablativeholopleather]

Nevermind that he had unfortunately had to scrape one of his fellows off the shore of the island after he'd been so badly injured that he wasn't able to recover, yet not quite able to die. Waynes could take a hell of a lot of damage before they quit moving after all, occasionally to their detriment.

"As much as I think it'd be pretty rad to be able to call in some reinforcements...they probably wouldn't make it here. This place doesn't let signals out or in. So, for the better that you'd prefer not to anyway."

[lordoftheozarks]

"Mm. I have noticed that these ship phones don't seem to be able to call out, or text outside the bounds. Are we all truly trapped here?" His lip curls with disdain. He can't quite keep his bruised ego from showing through. Someone really dares to kidnap him?

[ablativeholopleather]

Wayne doesn't blame him for his frustration with the idea, really. None of them wanted this, even if for some it is a better alternative to what they were already going through. "From what I can tell, yeah. Pocket dimension existence is a bitch."

[lordoftheozarks]

"I'm sure that if I were to vow that I will not stay trapped here, I will not be the first, nor the last. Let that stay unspoken then." Metaphorically, since he did just say it.

"You've been very accommodating for me so far. Is there nothing I can do to show my appreciate to you?"

[ablativeholopleather]

Yeah, people are very determined in their idea of escape, to the point of deciding they want to kill the Captain even if it means the reality they're in blips right out of existence. Which seems bad, of you ask him.

"Nah man, don't even sweat it. It's ways weird for people when they first get here. At least you're not freaking out panicking about the whole muster thing. You know someone swing a sword at me?" It didn't hurt overly much, but that had been a weird start to his day.

*appreciation. gj me

[lordoftheozarks]

"Did they?" He feigns being shocked, bringing a pale hand to his chest.

Yes, he just can't imagine what that feels like. (Looking at you, Erin.)

"Why would they do such a thing?"