TEST DRIVE MEME #8

[sailmods]

1. but times have changed for sailors these days

[you wake up.

it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.

the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:

Dear Passenger(s),

As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.

At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!

See You Real Soon!

Sincerely,
Gal Friday

you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.

you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]

Welcome aboard! I'm so happy you could join us!

[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.

after the drill is completed, you are seemingly free to go. or, well, your legs work, now. and maybe that's as good as it's gonna get.]

2. tried to amend my carnivorous habit

[the space inside John's where the piano normally sits is mysteriously vacant today. as a matter of fact, the entire piano bar is silent, without so much as a muzak-inspired interpretation of Uptown Girl to hum along to.

the piano itself seems to have disappeared... for the most part. unlucky, unsuspecting passengers who enter the cabin hallway, step out onto the lower decks, or find themselves in one of the other narrow corridors of the ship, may find themselves suddenly facing down a silent, unmoving grand piano. it takes up too much space to squeeze by comfortably...

and then, the cover lifts, exposing what looks to be... teeth?

yeah. yeah, those are its teeth. and it's coming right for you.]

3. that American creation on which I feed

[it had been a difficult October for bahamanuel, the bahamanal. its territory had changed utterly, becoming alien and strange. new predators were encroaching on its hunting grounds. its position in the natural order is under threat. and so, nature finds a way.

the old timers know to be wary of large piles of clothes, but even they won’t think to look twice at the tiny lumps of garish kids’ swimsuits and sundresses - until they feel something latch onto their leg, and then several more things, and anywhere from ten to twenty balled up clothes piles try to take down their prey.

the young must learn how to hunt, after all.]

Comments

[conjuredrabbit]

"I'm used to the wake up after dying being et. That part's nothing new at all, by me."

He huffs out something less than a laugh. "Right. Alright. Fuck. I mean, you know what I mean, but fuck."

[crushed_pearls]

"Yeah, fuck's the appropriate response. We're also not done with the scary shit." She doesn't look happy about not being done with the scary shit. Like. Not even a little does she look happy about not being done. "I've caught reports that the mirrors might be haunted. No idea how or why, I can't fucking see them. Some of your Contracts may not be functional here; I lost most of a very broad set of pacts when I woke up, and boy lemme tell you, I'm fucking steamed about it still. And!" She raises a finger. "The bars work on American drinking ages."

[conjuredrabbit]

"The bars aren't a problem. Can an obligate vegetarian find enough to eat here?" Because look, he's very not a meat-eater at all, in any way. Not being able to eat anything will kill just as much as being eaten, in its own way.

[crushed_pearls]

"I believe so? I'm friends with a voluntary vegetarian and she seems to get on fine, and the buffet has some..."

Erin trails off.

"...Look I'm pretty sure there's a gasoline dispenser at the buffet for one or more of the mechanical life forms, if it's got them covered it's got you covered."

[conjuredrabbit]

"Mechanical life forms?" He repeats those words slowly, warily, giving her an incredulous look he isn't sure she can see.

[crushed_pearls]

"Yep. Beings of intelligence and moral agency who are neither human nor organic. This place is a chaotic mix of different worlds, and some of 'em have people who are machines. They're fun. I mean that genuinely, they're fun people."

[conjuredrabbit]

"Different worlds." He shivers just hearing that, looks past her to the door and then back again. "What's that mean? How does that work?"

[crushed_pearls]

"Buddy, if you figure that you, you tell me. I've been at this awhile but I'm not a theoretical witch, I'm a practical one." She sighs, shrugs. "But I'm telling you now so you can prepare to keep an open mind, y'know?"

[conjuredrabbit]

"My Freehold is allied with local mages, werewolves and even on speaking terms with more than one of the local hunters. Open mind, I can at least play by ear. Though I'm definitely going to be avoiding the werecougar because I know how that ends already."

[crushed_pearls]

"Eurgh, wizards." Erin shudders. "The wandslingers here ain't so bad but back at home? Miss me with that shit, I did my time."

Still. Speaks to a very vibrant and politically active Freehold. Maybe the transition here might not be so bad for Bunny.

"There's other Lost here, though you'll forgive me if I let them approach you instead of the reverse. They're private people; like yours, their Masks still work. I'm the only out Changeling aboard."

[conjuredrabbit]

"What will you be telling them about me being here?" His ears perk slightly, as he tries to suss out Erin's exact motives and intentions. While the Spring Court back home wasn't as catty as some he'd heard of, they were the court opposed to Autumn, and the one he understood the least, in theory.

[crushed_pearls]

Erin shrugs. "New Lost, seems American, comes from an established Freehold, kinda skittish. Not much else. Your business is your business. That said, mind your manners with the walking storm. He ain't from a Freehold, so he's not necessarily familiar with the niceties."

Sorry Okie but it's a fair warning.

Erin debates something internally, then decides against it. "They're good folks. Actually got another spooky boy."

[conjuredrabbit]

"Yes, American." He smiles slightly crookedly, thinking about the rest. Skittish? He's prey, he can hardly help that at this point. Spooky boy...well, he is Autumn, even if he's low-ranking.

"No one in charge among us?"

[crushed_pearls]

God. Well. Here we go.

"Not as of yet. Not enough of us to bother, and..."

Maybe they can avoid the elephant only Erin can see in this room. "How long you been running loose?"

[conjuredrabbit]

“Just over two years. I do courier work on behalf of the hold. Never to the wolves, for obvious reasons, but all over town otherwise.”

It doesn’t feel like a long enough, especially now that the freedom is gone.

[crushed_pearls]

"Important work. Surprised to see a witch doing it but I can't throw stones given the whole 'Spring warrior' bit." Has Erin caught some attitudes about the Courts from New Avalon's influential Winter? Yes, yes she has. "The news ain't all bad. The people here are kind, the food doesn't run out, we've got actual doctors aboard plural. And..."

Erin's voice goes wistful. "Their worlds are often wondrous too, in their own ways."

There's a pause. "What year is it for you?"

[conjuredrabbit]

"Oh, see, I'm not a good witch, I'm a big ole scaredy cat. But the thing of it is, I'm fast as anything, can do polite, and most of all, I'm no kind of a threat. Mister Book, he scares folks. Me, I'm scared of folks. Harmless."

He chuckles, and then looks at her, a little confused by that last question. Scared further by its implications.

"It's 2019. Just turned, January."

[crushed_pearls]

"Ha! You're in my future, among other things. I'm shipping out from 2017, in a world where the Mask just -" Erin snaps her fingers, "blew out. Gone, kaput, every Lost revealed in an instant. Went better than you might expect. There's a lot of folks from different Earths and times hanging about the place, so uh. Get used to that one, it'll stop being surprising eventually."

No it won't.

[conjuredrabbit]

"Wait. What? How?" Look, she can't just drop that lore and continue on like nothing, it's against the rules.

[crushed_pearls]

"Good question! My money is on someone finding a way to break our part of the pact that powered it but fuck if I know for sure. No one took credit. Might be those Dawn Court weirdos." Erin shrugs, a little helplessly. "Either way it's been out like a light for going on two years. We're public back on my Earth.'"

[conjuredrabbit]

"Fuck. I can't even begin to imagine what that's meant for you." He shakes his head. "And here too, they know you for what you are. How's that go, most of the time?"

[crushed_pearls]

Deadpan: "If I had a nickel for every person who asked how my blindfold works I could buy a new reality for us all to live in."

Then, with significantly more pleasantness: "Other than that? Great, honestly. The folks here are curious and welcoming and to be honest we're not even in like, top five weirdness here. It helps that I don't eat people."

[conjuredrabbit]

Bunny lets out a sound that's either a cough or a laugh or maybe a little of both. "That's good. I been et enough for a lifetime."

...just wait, Bunny. Just wait.

[crushed_pearls]

"You're ever in trouble, come find me. I didn't go to all this effort to become a heavy hitter just to sit on it, I've got your back long as you didn't start it."

[conjuredrabbit]

"Does 'existing as a lagomorph' count as starting it?"

He gives her a wry look, and then quotes with the air of someone citing religious scripture: "All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a Thousand Enemies, and whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you, digger, listener, runner, prince with the swift warning. Be cunning and full of tricks and your people shall never be destroyed."