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TEST DRIVE MEME #8
1. but times have changed for sailors these days
[you wake up.
it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.
the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:
Dear Passenger(s),
As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.
At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!
See You Real Soon!
Sincerely,
Gal Friday
you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.
you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]
Welcome aboard! I'm so happy you could join us!
[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.
after the drill is completed, you are seemingly free to go. or, well, your legs work, now. and maybe that's as good as it's gonna get.]
2. tried to amend my carnivorous habit
[the space inside John's where the piano normally sits is mysteriously vacant today. as a matter of fact, the entire piano bar is silent, without so much as a muzak-inspired interpretation of Uptown Girl to hum along to.
the piano itself seems to have disappeared... for the most part. unlucky, unsuspecting passengers who enter the cabin hallway, step out onto the lower decks, or find themselves in one of the other narrow corridors of the ship, may find themselves suddenly facing down a silent, unmoving grand piano. it takes up too much space to squeeze by comfortably...
and then, the cover lifts, exposing what looks to be... teeth?
yeah. yeah, those are its teeth. and it's coming right for you.]
3. that American creation on which I feed
[it had been a difficult October for bahamanuel, the bahamanal. its territory had changed utterly, becoming alien and strange. new predators were encroaching on its hunting grounds. its position in the natural order is under threat. and so, nature finds a way.
the old timers know to be wary of large piles of clothes, but even they won’t think to look twice at the tiny lumps of garish kids’ swimsuits and sundresses - until they feel something latch onto their leg, and then several more things, and anywhere from ten to twenty balled up clothes piles try to take down their prey.
the young must learn how to hunt, after all.]
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But actually that was a legit assessment. Reno frowned slightly as he considered it. They weren't going to find an answer without looking for one though and they didn't have time for that. Or, Reno didn't feel like taking the time for it. He'd rather just beat the thing and kill it first. Then investigate if needed.
Reno glanced over at Demyx and his water sitar.]
Yeah, a real shame.
[He let the sarcasm drip to the floor before continuing down the hallway. He heard sounds ahead and stopped to signal. A second passed and he glanced at Demyx belatedly, realizing this wasn't like working with Rude who knew all his hand signals and non-verbal messages. He made a more obvious gesture of pointing to his himself, then his ears, and then down the hallway. I hear it down the hallway.
He started slowly forward, checking doors along the way to make certain nothing was hiding in the rooms to startle them.]
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He walks with Reno, quietly masking his steps when he can, peering down the hall and getting the doors on his side.
From what it looks like the piano seems to have reset itself back to where it had been, in a narrow hallway with barely room to squeeze around it. It's not exactly the most ideal place to fight either. ]
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In fact, maybe they could get a sneak attack off on it instead. Reno glanced at Demyx and tried gesturing some more. He pointed at Demyx, his sitar, then the piano. Then himself, his baton, and the piano again.
He huffed quietly, almost a silent laugh, then whispered.]
Let's sing it a duet. Water then lightning. Got it?
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Dance, water, dance! [ He could still make the water dance even if he's doing it at pianissimo.
There's a bit of a water swirl near them and then moves towards the piano, which although that was small, the geyser that appears underneath the piano is anything but.
Reno shouldn't worry about getting splashed, he's not going to let that happen because embarrassing mishaps should probably be avoided. ]
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The piano rises and slams into the ceiling on the flow of water, only to drop back down to the ground. And that's when Reno steps in for his part. Now that the thing is thoroughly soaked Reno hits it with an electrical attack from his rod. Lightning crackles all along the piano's surface and along the water's presence.
Reno takes an unnecessary step back as blue forks streak close to him--it wouldn't hurt him while he's protected by his baton's materia but it was instinctual. Besides, he got a better view of the thing frying.
Burnt wood wafted through the hallway. Reno peered at the piano and waited for it to show signs of life... or death.]
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Demyx waited for a breath too, but it was looking pretty crispy, and being thrown around did some damage to the legs without a doubt. He lets out that breath and sighs heavily. ]
Monster piano's a new one. [ He can honestly say that's never happened before. ]
[ He should probably go over and poke it and check to see that it's really down and out. Or, even better idea- ]
Hey, you should make sure it's not getting up. [ Better plan. ]
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Same but then I have seen a monster house so...
[He informed Demyx without taking his eyes off the piano. He waited to see if his voice provoked it into action but so far nothing. He finally got close enough to poke it with his baton. He gave it a nice whack on its... uh, top since it had no head.]
I think it's--
[Famous last words. It suddenly lurched forward and Reno won't admit that he screamed at the sight of a mouth full of teeth as it came at him. Instinctively he swiped his rod at it, showering sparks everywhere.]
no subject
This not very peaceful! [ He swings his sitar down on the abused piano with a loud crack. ]
What kind- [ thwack ] of a piano- [ thwack ] tries to eat people?! [ Another thwack, and this time he drops it down so the bladed end hits the keys. ]
[ Reno so owes him for that...or probably not, they should probably never mention it again. ]
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The piano has stopped moving by that point though. Reno expects it not to get back up this time.
But he keeps his distance anyway.]
Aww, my hero~. [He sing-songs, and then drops the act.] I say we burn it. Bonfire on the forward deck, anyone?
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Where's Axel when you need him?
[ Bonfire on the deck, bonfire on the deck! ]
I don't do fire magic, unless you've got some way to burn it.
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The, uh, other red head?
[Was that his name? Or was it Lea? Reno doesn't remember. (Doesn't know there's a difference.)]
Magic isn't the only way to start a fire, you know.
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That's what I'm saying, what've you got to set it on fire?
[ Alright someone has to be brave and Reno already did that so he goes over and kicks the piano with his toe. Yep, dead. Perfect. ]
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Reno flips his rod over in the air and catches back in his hand.]
Well, electricity can start a fire. But I was thinking of finding some matches. And maybe some gasoline. [beat] Wait, what about the kitchen? Can we get in there? You gotta have flames for a proper kitchen. Let's check it out.
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[ That's only logical. It's alright Reno, being in the company of redheaded smartasses is a lot he doesn't mind suffering. ]
Let's go down to check out the buffet. That might be the best shot.