... Yeah, I figured. Which blows 'cuz you've always been first for me. Even now. You and Ekko are neck and neck of level in importance to me. And at the time I just... wish I was that with you. I know you're gonna say I'm your first friend on this ship and blahblahblah.

But between Mizuki and me? I always felt less. Like he was always better in your eyes or I'm an afterthought. That after whatever gross shit you do with him then you come to me. And I was just... sick of being second or last. I've been that since I was a kid, y'know?

And it didn't really help when you made it seem like being with me was just so bad. I... I know I'm a curse and all but... am I really that terrible to be around? Would being with me be the worst thing ever to you? (...) — You were just so sure we wouldn't work out or it'll just blow up in our faces when... you didn't even let me shoot my shot, yet. How would you know the outcome if we didn't at least... try a lil'?

(she exhales out a sigh while combing her fingers through her bangs. now all the buried frustrations are bubbling up in the surface.)

If we, I dunno, did some sorta practice period or somethin'. We give it a go and then you give him a go. And if you still decided after that to be with him, at least I'd be satisfied knowing you gave me a chance. That I took the shot and missed. Then I wouldn't be... so angry about the whole thing.