Entry tags:
TEST DRIVE MEME #5

1. not subtle revealings
[you wake up.
it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.
the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:
Dear Passenger(s),
As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.
At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!
See You Real Soon!
Sincerely,
Gal Friday
you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.
you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]
Welcome! I'm very glad to have you aboard!
[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.
after the drill is completed, you are seemingly free to go. or, well, your legs work, now. and maybe that's as good as it's gonna get.]
2. a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling
[the reflections are missing. all of them. in mirrors. in television screens. on the backs of spoons. nothing looks back at you.
then, figures do show up. not your own, like you'd expect. thin, wispy apparitions, people with pleading eyes and hands, reaching out to place their palms against the surface, from their own end. faces familiar and not, beckoning, mouthing words you just can't quite make out. help me, it might be. get me out, perhaps. just until you're close enough, until your skin warms the surface of whatever it is you're peering into. and then, those same hands wrap, all too real, burning-cold against your flesh, and pull, trying to drag you through the surface, making up for their lack of strength with desperation. any flesh unlucky enough to enter the reflection comes back bone-white and cold, all sensation dead, though it will fade within a few hours.
in retrospect, it looks a bit more like they were saying something different. something more like, better you than me. or maybe it's not even words at all. they look a bit more like they're laughing.]
3. complex mementos
[but, hey. sometimes changes are good! like, today, in Playback, there's a brand-new game available for all the children to play! it's an old-fashioned sort of claw machine, the type that's so large, a particularly dedicated kindergartner could wriggle their way inside. the prizes vary, and sit loose: bags of candy, stuffed toys, firearms, painfully early-00s electronics, actually that one just looks like a dead iguana, tiny ship-branded knickknacks... like all the other games in the arcade, the game starts up automatically upon being touched; lack of quarters shouldn't keep you from having fun! pro tip: they are loaded, and they will go off if you suck at claw games and let it fall.]
hollyberry cookie | cookie run: kingdom
[on top of their other many positive attributes, Cookies are naturally very good jumpers. this becomes a very important skill to have when one finds themselves suddenly living in a world made for giants and gods, and very, very much not made for Cookies.
well, at least there’s a bar. multiple, in fact! it is hurikane that she hits up first, liking the sound of that name. a few daring leaps off chairs and tables lands her on the bar countertop with only a mild amount of scrambling. so, first insurmountable odd thoroughly surmounted. now she just needed to figure out how to actually get herself a drink…
well, when in a time of need, one must reach out and rely on your friends. she doesn’t have those, here. yet. so, she gives the giant walking into the bar her best smile and a hearty laugh, waving in greeting.]
Hello, friend! You wouldn’t mind helping out an old Cookie with a powerful thirst, would you? I’ve never seen such large bottles of juice in all my years; even I might not be able to finish one!
[which absolutely will not stop her from trying.]
B. person-sized option cw: slight cookie body horror
[the mournful faces she sees in the window as she passes are Cookies, but none are familiar to her. almost like they knew they didn’t have to be; she would be no less willing to help a complete stranger than she would her dearest friend. even if their faces, so pale and sad, brought to mind fields of white lilies…]
Right! Let’s get you all out of there! Stand back!
[they don’t have to drag her inside. she gladly punches the glass, gasping at the ice-cold shock of swarming hands, falling back so suddenly that she topples over, her shield clattering to the floor.
she pulls her glove off, expression twisting into horror. her dough has gone white as milk, and she knows even before she does it that when she touches it, the edges of her hand will crumble. pale crumbs fall to the carpet, leaving a jagged, desiccated edge.]
What magic is this… You! [glares at the glass] Asking for help, only to harm those who come to your aid? Someone ought to teach you some manners!
[so now she’s just squaring up with a window. it doesn’t not look like an old woman has gone insane.]
cookie sized option!
Slumping into a bar stool he considers his options when a very tiny and enthusiastic cookie nabs his attention. He goes to reply only to stop short, mouth open. A cookie. A talking cookie.
Sure, why not.
He chuckles sheepishly.]
Uuh, sure? You know it's not really juice, right?
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[laughs heartily at the clearly ridiculous idea]
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Heavens, no. Definitely not milk. [It's not a lie. Right??]
Here, uh...let me just grab that for you. [Surely this won't end badly for anyone.]
B - giant cookie? Giant Cookie.
He hears the glass shatter nearby and turns the corner to see a...
A...
Well. He's not exactly sure what he's looking at. But watching that arm turn white and crumble off is extremely horrifying!]
Holy shit, are you okay?
[She definitely looks like she's about to try and punch her way through a shattered window to get to something that just melted her arm off.]
Uh, you probably.. shouldn't touch it again?
[He'd physically drag her away, but he's also not sure if he should touch her since she seems to be able to fall apart?]
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[but, then she remembers that she's mad!]
I certainly won't fall for that trick again, but once I figure out how to get at those sneaky little monsters, oh, they'll be sorry!
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[Haha yeah okay he's really fucking snapped now hasn't he? What the fuck.]
Jam? Like...
You know what, nevermind. [This is way too weird.] I'm pretty sure you'll probably die if you go through there so gotta lure them out here. Somehow.
a. for the small cookie life
so he's definitely giggling like it's the funniest shit in the world. BUT a bro is a bro. if totally responsible teenagers can't order drinks then he bets cookies can't, either.]
Uhhh, sure? Wh......at kind of juice? Is this some PG-type fruit juice deal or are you lookin' to get shit-faced??
[if this is some shrek shit he's gonna lose his mind.]
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she blinks up at him for a moment, like she's trying to mentally translate whatever he's saying. do cookies curse? dark cacao should get to say fuck. if any cookie was going to say fuck, it'd be her.]
I am most certainly attempting to get "lit," as my granddaughter would say!
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Hahaha, hoooooly shit. For sure, Nana, you got it. [because this fucking cookie literally sounds like his good friend
and unrequited love interestNana... for obvious reasonshe's got an empty shot glass which is like, probably too big for her still??? but that doesn't mean he won't fill it up for her, straight from his own personal bottle of.... idk jack daniels? yeah that's good.
because sharing???? it's caring.]
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Well! Bottom's up! [she looks at the shot glass for a few seconds before shrugging her shoulders, placing her hands firmly on both sides of it, and hoisting it up over her head to drink from it, which she does in a possibly concerningly short amount of time before it's emptied. the glass lands back on the bar with a heavy clatter.]
Ah, now that's a fine... I'm not quite sure what it is, actually! But, it will certainly suffice until we can get some real Hollyberrian juice around here!
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Fuckin' sick, dude. [true respect from one
alcoholicpassionate fan of alcohol to another. does she want more??? he's gonna refill the glass just in case.] Uhhh, you could try asking??? Sometimes you get lucky with what they got in stock, but otherwise...[no okay sorry hold on] Like, just makin' sure here, you... are totally like. A real thing that's happening right now, right?
A
What? I- are you- juice? No- I mean, you're not juice, you're a cookie, what I mean to say is-
[ If Pearl had any interest in the whole process of swallowing and metabolizing, she might want to see if drinking actually did make things make more sense. ]
This isn't juice, this is alcohol, and I... are you... an adult cookie?
[ With humans she tended to go off size and amount of snot production, she had no baseline for cookies. ]