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TEST DRIVE MEME #2
1. this hotel room got a lot of stuff
[you wake up.
it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.
the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:
Dear Passenger(s),
As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.
At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!
See You Real Soon!
Sincerely,
Gal Friday
you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.
you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]
Welcome aboard! We're so glad to have you!
[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.
after the drill is completed, you are seemingly free to go. or, well, your legs work, now. and maybe that's as good as it's gonna get.]
2. and a touch-tone phone
[chatterbox isn't exactly the most popular venue onboard. it probably has something to do with the distinct lack of open liquor bottles. so, nothing personal. except it seems that it's decided to take it that way, suddenly.
anyone enjoying the other amenities of deck five will feel the distinct sensation of being watched while they do so. the kind of feeling a prey animal gets while being stalked on the grasslands. something may slither by their foot, or past their elbow while they rest it on the bar, but nothing appears to be there when they look.
until there is.
a black electrical cord originating from somewhere will, first, wrap around their ankle, tugging in a very clear "follow" instruction. should this instruction be ignored, a second cord will wrap around their other ankle, and, once again, tug. should this clear final warning be ignored... well, now they're being dragged down the promenade, and that's really their own fault, isn't it. don't struggle. struggling means more cords show up. and none of them seem terribly aware that most species need to expand their lungs to live.
their final destination, no matter the journey, is chatterbox's main stage, where the karaoke machine awaits. the cords place a microphone in their hand; the mic's cords bind it tightly to their hand.
they don't have to pick a song. there isn't an actual gun to their head, in any literal sense. it's just, those cords really don't seem that interested in letting go until they do.
and if you were heading to chatterbox anyway? welcome to the weirdest goddamn karaoke night you've ever seen.]
3. and a bucket of ice (cw: cannibalism mention)
[no longer will scoops be bound by the shackles of only having 31 flavors. for this month, and this month only, a sign that very much looks like Friday hand-wrote it announces, they will have 32!
what is that mysterious 32nd flavor? it depends, really: the letters on the display case seem to shift and change with each new pair of eyes that fall upon them, with the contents changing along with it. someone from the capital wasteland might find some Nuka-Cola ™ branded ice cream. twilight town residents will be thrilled to find sea salt on the menu. and a frankly concerning amount of people bring out a flavor that only describes itself as "long pig." it's a weird off-white color. don't think about it too hard.]
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"People have— the moon? The moon in the sky." Okay, that sentence sounds daft as soon as she says it aloud, but let her live that is just as crazy sounding as it is impressive. Let her get her head around that for a moment, nevermind the rest. "God's teeth, alright. Wow."
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"...what in God's name... that's really the moon? And this happened earlier than a hundred years gone?"
It's probably a good job that moving pictures aren't an unknown quantity in her time even if they're hardly a feature of her daily life because she doesn't need the extra level of mindboggling right now.
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Time travel fuckery, César.
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Crabb shakes her head, finishing letting the information settle. Insanity, that's what this is. Absolute insanity. But that in itself isn't exactly new in her life.
"Summer said something about our timeline being 'different', too. About Gallery not existing in other places at all? Still a weird thought, that. Can't exactly say how our technology will line up by your time, though. Obviously."
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There's a flash of sadness across his face that almost breaks his smile. "Not only is my technology ahead of other similar worlds, but... I suspect I don't exist. That my parents never met. And without that, the Nanite Project would've never existed, nor would my parents' children."
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"Whole other worlds... whose to say any of us exist in anyone else's?" Is that meant to be a reassuring observation? Hard to say, she's probably not sure herself. "If Gallery don't exist in other places, I bet I don't either, for one. Gah, not sure I like that thought either, actually..."
Well, if it was, it backfired immediately!
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He isn't sure how he managed to say that while still smiling, but he did it.
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Crabb winces slightly, yeah that'd sure sounds like it'd do it. Still, "Could say the same for a lot of people, I figure. Couldn't take changing much to stop a couple people meeting, yeah? 'sides, we're not from or in those worlds. Sounds like the kinda data I'd be getting told to ignore 'cause all it is is noise."
Christ, she already misses Ferrier.
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Crabb waves a hand in a 'no problem' or 'don't mention it' sort of gesture. "Heard it from a very smart woman, helped me keep my head on straight a good few times. Good to see it do the same for someone else."
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“Through Bastrop, is the short of it. They met at that club of Summer’s, then he ended up wrapped up in an investigation we were doing.” Which is the most delicate way to phrase that, because she can’t exactly be sure what Johnny’s told this guy or not, and she has some tact thank you very much. “Bastrop and Ducky had to leave the country, when all was said and done, and Ferrier and me moved into the Margrave to run shop out of there.”
She huffs a laugh.
“So he was kinda my landlord, ‘til now.”
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"Huh, that sure is an investigation to end investigations." There's stuff Crabb is skimming over, like the description of what they were investigating, but César thinks it's uncouth to ask for the details of something that caused two people to have to flee the country. "But you did end up landing with a good landlord. So you do detective work, then? Or at least investigative. I'm a scientist myself, so I keep my investigations towards things like machines and how the universe works."
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"You don't know the half of it. Things keep getting crazier, if you can believe it." Which she feels kind of stupid for saying after she says it, because of course he can, they're on a cruise ship in another world, things can always get crazier, but still. "It's detective work, yeah. Used to work for the state, back during that debacle—Chief Constable of the Gallery Police, that was me. But circumstances rather... changed my priorities. Now we're all independent."
Of course it all runs a little deeper than just detective work, but it's the same deal. Not telling the whole truth about everything they get up to is also pretty ingrained, at this point.
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"Got it in one. The kind that runs right to the top." The kind that makes you feel like a blind idiot for not seeing it sooner. It's weird to think now how willing she was to just keep her head down and keep at it. "And thanks. It's good to be out and able to do some damned good without Gall breathing down my neck. Slimy bastard..."