TEST DRIVE MEME #5

[sailmods]

1. not subtle revealings

[you wake up.

it doesn't matter where you were before. going to bed? dying? opening the door to face a great evil? same result. you wake up in a soft bed with starched sheets in a cool, darkened room, sunlight peeking out from behind thick curtains. maybe you're alone; maybe you aren't. maybe you immediately notice the folded paper on the bedside table near your head. if you don't, you better fix that real quick: you won't be able to even open the door before you read it.

the note itself is written in a neat hand on white card stock; there is a stylized logo of a ship with the words SERENA ETERNA printed underneath. the note reads as follows:

Dear Passenger(s),

As your cruise director, it is my great honor to welcome you aboard the Serena Eterna, your destination for fun and adventure! We know you could have chosen any cruise line for your vacation, and we're very grateful you chose ours! On behalf of the Captain, I would like to assure each and every passenger that will we do whatever it takes to fulfill all your needs and desires during your journey with us.

At your earliest possible convenience, please attend the mandatory lifeboat drill by the end of the day. I'm sure everyone is very eager to get started on all the fun and sun, but safety always comes first! You can find your life jacket in your cabin's closet; carry it to your assigned muster station on deck one, where I will take you through the drill. If you can't find me in the crowd, just look for the gal with the winning smile!

See You Real Soon!

Sincerely,
Gal Friday

you walk to deck one. you have no other choice: every time you try to step in a direction some unseen being considers "not towards deck one," you find your legs no longer move, staying stock still, frozen. whether compelled quickly by curiosity, or delayed by pure stubbornness, the result is the same, and you are left milling around with other similarly curious or stubborn people.

you see someone in uniform near the front of the crowd. she seems to be a gal, but is missing the winning smile, along with most of her other features. she seems to see you, though, rushing to your side and placing a lei around your neck with great formality. a voice, cheery but artificial, sees to come from nowhere and everywhere.]

Welcome! I'm very glad to have you aboard!

[you touch the lei. rooster feathers, lotus seeds, and a carved circle of something white and hard, linked onto a silk string.

after the drill is completed, you are seemingly free to go. or, well, your legs work, now. and maybe that's as good as it's gonna get.]

2. a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling

[the reflections are missing. all of them. in mirrors. in television screens. on the backs of spoons. nothing looks back at you.

then, figures do show up. not your own, like you'd expect. thin, wispy apparitions, people with pleading eyes and hands, reaching out to place their palms against the surface, from their own end. faces familiar and not, beckoning, mouthing words you just can't quite make out. help me, it might be. get me out, perhaps. just until you're close enough, until your skin warms the surface of whatever it is you're peering into. and then, those same hands wrap, all too real, burning-cold against your flesh, and pull, trying to drag you through the surface, making up for their lack of strength with desperation. any flesh unlucky enough to enter the reflection comes back bone-white and cold, all sensation dead, though it will fade within a few hours.

in retrospect, it looks a bit more like they were saying something different. something more like, better you than me. or maybe it's not even words at all. they look a bit more like they're laughing.]

3. complex mementos

[but, hey. sometimes changes are good! like, today, in Playback, there's a brand-new game available for all the children to play! it's an old-fashioned sort of claw machine, the type that's so large, a particularly dedicated kindergartner could wriggle their way inside. the prizes vary, and sit loose: bags of candy, stuffed toys, firearms, painfully early-00s electronics, actually that one just looks like a dead iguana, tiny ship-branded knickknacks... like all the other games in the arcade, the game starts up automatically upon being touched; lack of quarters shouldn't keep you from having fun! pro tip: they are loaded, and they will go off if you suck at claw games and let it fall.]

Comments

[da_champion]

Hawke raises both eyebrows at the woman. "I have no idea what that means. Loaded with what?"

But the thing in his magical grasp doesn't waiver. He's perfectly comfortable keeping the thing hovering for a few hours. It really took very little mana to maintain the spell.

"You'll have to forgive me, I have no idea what most of this stuff is. My world doesn't have it." He is very much a simpleton in comparison to everyone else.

[da_champion]

"Garrett Hawke." He takes the man's hand and gives a firm shake. "Everyone just calls me Hawke, though."

For once, that name wouldn't bring trouble. No one here had ever heard of him and all the business in Kirkwall. He's not the Champion. He's just a bumbling simpleton mage. It's refreshing really.

"I guess I'll have to find these other mages and have a chat with them." Though he's never had any formal training in magic. Hawke's not sure what he'll be able to contribute.

[da_champion]

Hawke blinks at the man for a moment.

"Well, I understand the power-hungry maniac mage part." That's familiar and almost like home. He's killed plenty of those in his day. One more shouldn't be a big problem.

"If you point me at that mage I'll happily kill him for you. Free of charge too." Hawke not the least bit bothered by the idea. One dead mage is like an afternoon to him. It really shouldn't take that long to solve unless these people were against killing him for some reason.

[myagic]

[Thankfully!! Even if it's probably not real, Rita isn't exactly eager to see it again.]

L-like I said...it's probably just fake.

[More importantly, though...]

But when you wake up, any injuries and stuff are gone. So...I guess you'd come back normally, even if that happened to you.

[serialskiller]

"Right, if he could be killed by any normal means, we'd have done that months ago. Don't insult us."

There's a snappy tone to Murderbot's voice. "I've seen him redirect bullets with magic, and absorb blows from a sword with no damage to himself. He's in control of this reality, and we haven't found a way to defeat him yet, but sure, you can be cocksure as you please."

[da_champion]

"Well, sure, mages bend reality to their will." The man's anger rolls of Hawke like water. He's insulted plenty of people with his glibness. He's rather used to folks thinking something of the worst of him right away.

"But, have you tried magic?" Hawke holds his hand palm up and summons just a little bit of flame. It's been terribly reassuring to have his magic. Hawke would be very skittish without that. "Because sometimes, it takes a mage to weaken another mage. Get through that barrier so someone with a sword can come in and cut a head off."

Certain, he's cocksure. Hawke knows himself and knows his power. He's certain the right combination could lead to this mages death.

[winepouring]

[ Welp, so much for trying to be inconspicuous. ]

Ahaha! You don't think it does either, do you? It really is not my style...

[ Since Jade isn't bothering to hide anything, then it would just be weird if Shi Qingxuan kept forcing it. He stands up straight again, pulling the lei over his head—careful not to let the feathers and seeds tangle in his hair. ]

But are everyone's the same with no variation, not even with the feathers? [ Though that did seem to be the way it looked to him, he still has to ask. It's...a lot of feathers. ]

[serialskiller]

"You're not the only magic-user from a fucking magical world on this ship. It's been tried."

Huff-puff. Murderbot's insulted on behalf of those who have tried just utterly violencing the captain, that this upstart thinks he can roll in here and do what no one else could for months.

[da_champion]

To be fair, Hawke has done that many, many times in his life.

"Really?" Hawke twists his hand around and the flames vanish. He's disappointed to hear that magic wasn't able to stop another mage. That's a very rare thing to hear about.

"I guess we'll have to try harder." Because Hawke refuses to be held prisoner by another mage. That's absolutely horseshit. This isn't the Imperium. "What's a bullet, by the way?"

[businessorlibation]

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Hawke." For someone dressed like money, Johnny's very polite. It comes with being a businessman who's made his dime in the service industry. Whether it's a simple working class pub or a champagne lounge, manners do about 30% of the work for you.

"In the meantime, if there's anything you need on this ship--places to go, things to do, things to wear, I can assist with that to some degree."

[winepouring]

I see...

[ So it either isn't real, or it will spring back to life tomorrow. The mental image of this head growing into a full, living person the next day while crammed into that tiny machine flashes through Shi Qingxuan's mind briefly, and he's almost grateful he could catch the little thing, if by accident. ]

Still, there's something that bothers me...

[ He starts, then stops, considering his company again. It's a little hard to reconcile talking about such morbid things with such a young maiden... Or maybe it's less her age and more the fact she screamed in fright right beside his ear not ten minutes ago.

In the end, he chooses to shelve the other thought for now. ]

Miss, we still haven't won your lucky hair pin!

[da_champion]

"Just Hawke. I don't need a title." He makes a face. Titles have brought him nothing but trouble, after all. Best to avoid them, really.

He laughs under his breath and shakes his head. "I can navigate the ship just fine but I don't have half an idea of what anything is."

The modern nature of the ship is the most unsettling thing to Hawke. He's fine with demons and spirits and strange magic. That's normal. The light switch? Madness to him. Even now, he's still not in typical clothing. He's got his tunic and breeches and boots. No armor even though he'd feel safer in it.

[myagic]

[Too bad she didn't quite get around to details like the fact they always wake up in their cabin beds, huh... (Unfortunately, he'll probably find that out eventually, though.)

Rita blinks, distracted from his unfinished train of thought when he brings up the pin again.]

Oh--that's right.

[She turns back to the claw machine, looking for the pin--there it is, same spot as before.]

...Maybe I should just bust it open...

[businessorlibation]

"I'll explain what I can for you, if you'd like. Though I'm no scientist, so some of it I may need to punt." He lets out a bit of a laugh, more self-mocking than directed at Hawke. "It's a bit much, I suppose?"

To him, if the circumstances were different, a ship like this would be perfect. Johnny suffers from agoraphobia. To have a self-contained floating city, a place he could learn thoroughly and never leave, he might be content.

[winepouring]

[ Yep, morbid thoughts go away!!

But, uh.

Shi Qingxuan tilts his head in question. ]

If this captain is as sadistic as you say, won't he punish you for breaking into a machine? You've been practicing for so long, so maybe this will be your winning hand.

[da_champion]

"If you explained everything I don't understand about stuff around here, you'd never stop talking." He is deeply, wildly, incredibly ignorant of modern technology.

He sighs and flexes his strange hand some more to get the blood flowing back faster. "You have to understand the world I come from is nothing like this. We have ships, but they're made of wood and not even the biggest war ship is the size of this one. A hot bath? You have to heat the water bucket by bucket. You'd be better pointing me towards a library to read. Spare yourself the trouble."

Eventually, Hawke would catch up. He had to since he was trapped here with everyone else.

[businessorlibation]

"The only library on this ship is full of storybooks--it's not going to be useful to you." Sadly. It's clearly needed in this instance.

"I imagine meals must also be an interesting challenge, full of unfamiliar things, then?"

[myagic]

[That's actually not a bad question, but Rita just shrugs.]

Even if you'd think that, his magic just fixes everything. You can break anything on the ship, and it'll just repair itself the moment you look away.

Besides...I need to get some revenge on this stupid thing...

[For all the time she spent...and for scaring them with that shrivelled head! Rita starts casting an earth spell, a bronze magic circle appearing at her feet.]

[serialskiller]

"Do crossbows and-or cannons exist in your world?"

With those, it can at least try to explain guns and bullets. Or at least get the very rough edges of the concept out.

[da_champion]

"Yes, but it's food. I eat it anyway." Hawke's not intimidated or foolish enough to turn his nose up at strange food. "I've eaten questionable things before."

Rats in Lowtown. The salted fish when crossing the sea to Kirkwall. Ham that tasted like despair. Hawke's stomach can tolerate a lot of abuse.

"Is there another way to find out about things besides asking people?" Hawke really doesn't want to be a bother. He also doesn't want to reveal just how stupid he is compared to everyone else here.

[da_champion]

"Only the Qunari have cannons. We have ballistas. And my best friend has a mechanical crossbow. Her name's Bianca." Hawke suddenly very fiercely misses Varric. What a story his friend could make out of all this.

"Well, the Vints have magical cannons but I don't think that's what you mean." Both of those things the man mentioned are distinctly not magical. If he meant something magical he would've said so when Hawke first talked about taking down the mage that controls this place.

Which he still believes is possible.

[serialskiller]

"A bullet is a projectile, like an arrowhead with no shaft, fired through a tube by an explosion like a tiny handheld cannon."

See, simple enough! That makes perfect sense, that people can make things like that.

[winepouring]

Revenge? On a game?? How is this something to carry out revenge on??

[ Young Miss Mordio, aren't you acting petty now?? Is there any use trying to stop her when she's already started something? Shi Qingxuan isn't foolish enough to get caught up in whatever is going on, so he takes a few steps back to observe.

As anxious as he feels, he isn't sure if intervening is the right call either when she already has some spell activating at her feet.

Well, he resolves himself, if things get bad, he'll jump in and protect her! ]

[fonomena]

[It's the thought that counts, and all that!! Trying to be inconspicuous isn't a terrible idea, actually, though the individual happening to commandeer this ship has rather...extensive eavesdropping skills, let's say? And sometimes, acting like there's nothing to be subtle about at all can be just as concealing in its own way--]

Hmm, well, I wasn't going to say that... [Though Jade does tilt his head at this point, as a moment's pause is taken to peer with speculative amusement at this man and his positively billowing robes.] But it surely is a rather distinctive style all its own. Exactly the same with every passenger, that's correct--down to ornaments! Still...I do hope you're not planning to toss it overboard, are you? Some people have, I think, but I'd advise against it.

[Despite the fact that Friday's already long since wandered off, by this point; evidently this word of advice isn't about sparing her feelings necessarily, exactly...? For that matter, even as the cheer in his tone and smile hasn't diminished at all whatsoever, Jade's glance is shifting to scan the area immediately about them now, as if he's idly looking for compromising ears anyhow. ...Which isn't anything to worry about at all, surely!]

Out of curiosity, sir, are you familiar with charms? Talismans? Things along such lines...

[essentiallyharmless]

At that, Lucy looks him up and down for a moment. (Mostly up. He's got over a foot on her.) No idea what a gun is, or... modern technology in general probably?

"It's like a crossbow. It could shoot someone," she explains calmly. "Mind if I...?"

Since she doesn't know how to explain what she's about to do, all she can do is warn him she's about to do something. Then she gently sticks her hand through the glass, her arm looking as solid as ever, but clearly intangible. She reaches up to take the gun and pull it out of the machine.